Sunday, March 16, 2008

Hello Very Good Friend,

I write letter speaking in Russian accent. You probably not hear Russian accent
when reading, so try reading outloud with Russian accent.
It will help with cadence of sentence and choice of word. Lack of pluralization too.

I am like Beethoven now. Not composer;
melancholy. Dating frustrating woman, always fighting.
Never know what fights are about - she yell in Russian
I speak only in Russian accent.
This is called language barrier. Beethoven was depressed,
writing 5th symphony among others.
Depressed for much of his life, but angry-depressed
writing 5th, which does not surprise.
It is very angry depressed symphony.
Bum bum bum buuuummmm, bumbumbum buuuummmmm.
I read about this in book, which cited letters B. wrote
during this time (1802-1810 I think). I would look it up but
not sure where to find book at moment, too lazy to search.
Still writing in Russian accent though. Counts for something yes?

Having use of melancholy though.
It is better than german Sehnsucht,
which is “deep longing” That is intense wanting of something far away.
That is Rilke (german poet died 1947[8]) – very good poet.
German good language for sehnsucht.
Beethoven was German too I think, but I guessing he used melancholy not sehnsucht.
Using melancholy – sorry, got sidetracked – is good.
Very powerful emotion: reveals beauty, understanding.
Ignorance bliss; knowledge sorrow, but from sorrow we learn compassion.
This makes good art. Sorry, slipping into
French accent for a bit. Apologies for my offense, I do not mean to give such. Now British.

Art is good. Writing,
practicing guitar and drums. Friend says I am
Renaissance Man. Sounds right. Working on books.
Actual books. Trying to figure out how to put them together,
build them. Is complicated. A play also.
Good paring of East/West. Possibly add themes from Les Miserable.
Friend also tells me
I have weird ideas (considering letter written in Russian accent, very true).

Otherwise good. Computer died. Poor. Good not best word,
outlook improving is better. Idea that night
lets us appreciate day, rain
appreciate sun, sadness joy. I think you know
Silver Lining. Idea is – melancholy as
“great illuminator of hope”. Outlook hopeful.
Coffee helps.
Also computer dead = no internet = no movie trailers,
blogs, websites, porn = no Big Distractions. Helps with writing.

Helps with attention span too. Up to 12 minutes now,
better than national average! (joke in Russian accent hard to convey).
Work is same. Now at parties
1 in 100 people know what I am talking about; no one understand job I do.
Still waiting for raise though. Still looking for silver lining (maybe: hunger = weight loss?).

Spring very busy. Lots of friends coming to visit.
Hope to have passport soon to visit friend in Europe. Probably end of summer.
We call ourselves Vecais – old man. Veces – old men. He, I, and another friend are The Veces. Been calling ourselves by this for years. Stupid fun, but we laugh. It is way to remind ourselves to enjoy life. This is good time of year to remember such. More daylight, more world to enjoy. Good time for walks and running.

Good time to spend writing in park. Lots of people to look at
inspirational. Can appreciate spring, summer, fall because of winter.
Low temperature – low energy; warming, hot – lots of energy.
Learn to surf this summer. Promise making to self.

In Buddhism idea of
Impermanence =
everything that is, isn’t;
everything that isn’t, is.

Another way to look at silver lining.
Is good to write letter.
Writing letters more now that computer has died.
Have to type them. Trying to not
edit when
typing, keep true to
mistakes. More like letter.

Cheers (is British sign-off, unsure of russian accent sign-off),
The -.

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